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A story of Loneliness

This is a fictional story of loneliness and how it can affect someone without the people around them knowing.

Laura is a woman in her 40's. She is a single mum of 2 who has spent the last 20 years being Mum. She is and always has been the main caregiver whether with the children's father or not. She has moved around alot in her life, seen the world, and had a life of adventures.

Laura is intelligent, funny, talented and interesting however, a lot people find her difficult to get to know.

Laura doesn't mean to be aloof and standoffish but her life has been difficult. It has been a life is full of sadness, terrible abuse and neglect, this has lead to Laura learning to guard her heart and have wide boundaries. All she has wanted is to find someone who truly loves her with his heart and soul and to have friends like everyone else. It just hasn't happened.


Laura has had and does have friends but none of said friends invite her out, but they all tell her of their great weekends, and the parties they have been too. She sees all the photos on social media and wonders why no one ever thinks of her. She has asked them out many times but most of the time they are all busy. Even her own family seem to forget about her. Laura is lost and alone and has no idea what to do. She feels like she is treading water and not going anywhere. The feeling of being unnoticed, and invisible is the hardest. Is she really that much of a terrible person that no one cares, is she that unlikeable? She must be unworthy of others, not good enough, it really is the only explanation.


Laura has silently battled her mind since she was a teenager. Many times she has been on the verge of giving up and ending it. No one knows the extent of her depression and the dark places her mind goes. The many nights she has cried herself to sleep, or the things that go though he mind out of share desperation. How many times she has put herself in harm's way just to get some much needed attention. But no one notices because Laura has her shit together, she is a strong independent woman. Hmmmm?


Over the last 4 years Laura has been working hard to change her thoughts and to be more approachable. She has made some good friends, the problem is most of them are married and Laura is not. So socially Laura still has the same problem. Even those who are closest to her and should be her biggest supporters are all too busy for her and her sadness goes unnoticed.


Laura is independant, she has friends, we know she does, she is always out and about and looks like she is living her best life. We know she has a few personal issues and her work can be difficult but she's good. We don't need to worry about her, she always gets back on her feet. We are so proud of her. Little do they know the struggle it is to be Laura.


She is single and most people she knows have partners. She often wonders what is wrong with her. Men have always taken her for granted, and treated her badly. They don't treat her like she is an important part of their life, as long as she cooks, cleans and takes care of the kids, who cares. People just say "the right one will come along"well he hasn't.

"Maybe your standards are too high" Hmm what wanting someone who actually wants to take you out and treats you like your important to him, doesn't seem too much to ask.

Laura's problem with men stems from the fact that the most important man in her life, the one that created her has never cared, so she has spent her life trying full a void that is impossible to fill.


Just think positively! Don't worry about it you will work it out, you always do. You need to learn to love yourself more!!


Laura has had some very low moments, sometimes she has tried to reach out. The last time one of the most important people in her life ignored her. One of her friends told her just find a new passion. Neither of them checked on her the next day or the next or the next. Why? Is it because Laura just gets on with it? Laura has mastered the art of mask wearing. She has learnt this by experience, don't complain too much don't bring too much attention to your problems, just get over it and move on.


It is hard to move on when you have suffered the brutality Laura has with very little support and having to do everything on your own for most of your life. But she continues to silently fight her demons, with no one noticing, no one checking to see if she is okay, no one showing they care. But they all say they care, they're just busy. They're too busy thinking how great she is doing, too busy ignoring the signs, too busy not paying attention. She is busy because it is her way of fighting the loneliness, but it's boring when you are constantly on your own and everywhere you go you see couples. Sometimes you feel like your they only single person left in the world. Once again you get the "it will happen for you one day, one day your person will come along"


Unfortunately some people in Laura's situation will give up. Laura wont, she has hope, but it is hope she has created on her own, like everything else she does. It doesn't stop the loneliness though. Sometimes it is debilitating, but no one notices. Interestingly if one day she gave up they would all say "she seemed okay, we don't understand why she did it, we never knew, we didn't see the signs.


There is always hope. One thing about spending your life alone is that you do get creative with how to spend your time. You find your passions and follow them because hey what else do you have to do? It's important to stay focused on the present, set goals and learn to celebrate on your own. There is something very satisfying knowing that you don't need a whole army of people around to be great. You have to find away through the dark times but know it is okay to have those moments. The important thing is how you pick yourself up and realise that you are on your own journey. It may be a tough one but it is one you have chosen so what are the lessons you need to learn. The best thing about being on your own is not being answerable to anyone but you and no one to judge you for your terrible taste in music, questionable dance moves in the kitchen, and all those little guilty pleasures.


If you know someone like Laura don't ignore them when they reach out to you. Don't tell them you're going to spend time with them and then make other plans. Your time is what they want, they want to feel like they matter. like you actually give a shit and for the love of god stop telling them to love themselves more. They do love themselves the problem is they feel like no one does. We all need human contact from people who love us completely that are not children. Eventually for some self love isn't enough. Don't take it for granted that we are all okay. Some people are better actors than you think and they hid their pain because they think they are unworthy.

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